Thursday, April 07, 2011

mother & son talk

I admit i am not a patience person, especially when coaching my boys homework.

Like i mention in previous post, this year, their homework are getting heavier, daily got 5 books, weekend 8 books to finish and not forgetting there are 5-6 pages of chinese words need to write.

Fearles is quite slow on his study. He always cannot focus and always in his own wonderland. Like a minute ago i taught him the word, he can forgot easily the next minute. Taught him how to do plus and minus, he can do the first three then suddenly he like lost his mind, forgot how to do the rest. I always end up scolding like a "crazy mad woman", pulling his ear, or use ruler to beat the hand *sigh*, which i really don't want this happen always. Final result, a stress mother + a crying kid = double stress and double sigh.

There was one day, after my boys finish their homework, and we spent sometime sit together and watched tv. I asked Fearles, is he angry with me, that i always scold him when doing homework. He shake his head and said "no", i asked again, why he not angry with me? I always scolded till he cried. He answer " because I always make you angry, that's why you scold me." Awwwww..make me feel more guilt! Fearles is a mature and quiet boy, he don't express himself much and he is not like Cruz, more cheeky and like to talk a lot. When he said this, i am a bit "shock" and also feel a bit "touch" too.


Bryan and Brandon's Mama said...

Quite sweet also hor. Did you cry??

Small Kucing said... next time to scold or not?

suituapui said...

Very hard for parent to teach own child - tendency to get very angry and frustrated... Hire a tutor.

reanaclaire said...

Scold we get heartbreak.. if beat them? gosh.. nowadays our kids really make us grow soft in heart! seriously speaking, I beat my kids before.. when they were young.. i can still remember very well.. they cried, i cried.. sigh..

Alice Law said...

Yeah, kids always amazed us with their thoughtfulness... it was us that always take for granted of how they feel(I'm guilty too)!:)

Merryn said...

awww.... i 'choke' on water a bit reading Fearless' response... such a sweet boy... :)

Pete said...

Aiyo, so fierce ah!
Agree with STP, better get a tutor or maybe send them to afternoon day care that have teachers to help them with their homework.
It is actually very hard for parents to teach their own kid.....really stressful lorr!

Bananazஇ said...

打在兒身痛在娘心 *dǎ zài ér shēn tòng zài niáng xīn* (Beat on the son's body pain in the mom's heart). Hope your children dont read your blog to pick this up hehe. I used to say this to my late mama when she gets angry with me to preempt a beating. She always fell for it ended up telling me dunno want to get more angry or to laugh but usually she will lolz. Picked up this phrase from 'fong sai yoke' in the movies. Its a blessing my late mom & dad never used a cane on me..~;).

etceteramommy said...

He's a big boy now. So 'sek lum'. Good for him. At least he knows why e's being punished. Itsimportant the understand.

Yvonne said...

Agree with STP. My patient level is very low, too. Have the tendency to "burst" easily. Now sending my girl to arithmetic class because I gave up teaching her myself. I don't want to use cane so frequently.

Fearless is so mature and understands why he's being scolded. I'm touched....

mommy to chumsy said...

aww...he is a sensible one. Always very quiet and full of thoughts :) gosh, so many homework on weekends?

Annie Q said...

Bryan and Brandon's mama: Ya, he is a sweet boy. No la, i didn't cry, but i quite surprise with his statement.

small kucing: when naughty and don't know how to do homework, still have to scold. >..<

STP: Once they start standard 1, will sent them for tuition, now too young for them to go for tuition? Let them enjoy first, will suffer later.

reanaclaire: Usually is that moment when you're angry, after you scold and beat, you will feel so regret after that, then will start think myself, how come i cannot cool myself down instead of scolding or beating. :S

Alice Law: not easy to be a parent ya. *sigh*

Merryn: he is quite mature thinking, he don't talk or express himself much, but sometime he will give me surprise.

Pete: hahahhaha..i am "tigeress" la, yes i am that fierce!
Ya, like what i reply to STP, i will think of sending them for tuition or get a tutor at home once they go to standard one. Now i suffer first lo.

Bananaz: Wow! You're lucky boy, never get cane. Ya, 打在兒身痛在娘心, i think we all mummies feel the same, if can we sure don't want to end with cane. :(

etceteramommy: Yes, when i scold them i make sure they understand why i scold and why i beat. Not that i like to scold and beat them, but when they are naughty and out of control, i will use the cane. So far i can said i have not use cane for very long time already.

Yvonne: I do think of sending them to arithmetic class too, but think of when they are back with more homework, i take back. I check with their kindy teacher saying i want to sent them for arithmetic class, you know what the teacher said? You don't pity them, with so much homework, just let them enjoy now, soon they will pick up. This make me feel a lot better. :)

mommy to chumsy: Yes, always quiet and full of thoughts!! Ya, now weekend no more a weekend for me, it's a homework weekend, beside homework, piano practice and also music homework. *sigh*

BoeyJoey said...

double boys, double homework, double stress!

but your heart also melts double times :-D

Yee Ling said...

same here same ere!!Everytime i am coaching my girl to do homework..especially Math...**pulling hair like mad woman.